Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
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