addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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