none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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