It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
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