first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
