This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
The dick lei will go down in squad history
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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