now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
