You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
