Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
