At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
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