The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
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