You're my little dorito
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
