theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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