I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
