Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Congratulations! We have a period
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize