I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
