5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
