i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
im six kinds of drunk right now
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Randomize
