I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Randomize
