I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
