I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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