so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
