barbara walters just said penis...
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Randomize