Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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