His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize