I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Randomize
