I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Randomize
