i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
