turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
