dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
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