Texts From Last Night

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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.

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  (203): hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother. http://tfl.nu/cqrd
  Replies (4) Good night (916) Bad night (3787)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.

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  (440): i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends. http://tfl.nu/xfyh
  Replies (12) Good night (925) Bad night (4169)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back

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  (203): Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back http://tfl.nu/t7ho
  Replies (63) Good night (2328) Bad night (4158)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?

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  (778): Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird? http://tfl.nu/7neo
  Replies (26) Good night (4212) Bad night (1010)
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  (662): View more from Mississippi

  you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again

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  (662): you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again http://tfl.nu/srv7
  Replies (21) Good night (6562) Bad night (834)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.

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  (440): he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life. http://tfl.nu/ggva
  Replies (14) Good night (8688) Bad night (1133)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling

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  (781): No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling http://tfl.nu/pro8
  Replies (5) Good night (1505) Bad night (1154)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?

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  (860): i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet? http://tfl.nu/i7et
  Replies (7) Good night (1088) Bad night (621)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.

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  (208): Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen. http://tfl.nu/0ir7
  Replies (3) Good night (717) Bad night (892)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?

  (416): View more from Toronto

  I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way

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  (416): Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again? (416): I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way http://tfl.nu/h01t
  Replies (4) Good night (776) Bad night (1151)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song

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  (513): I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song http://tfl.nu/4m2s
  Replies (9) Good night (493) Bad night (658)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.

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  (330): STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big. http://tfl.nu/njru
  Replies (4) Good night (1650) Bad night (589)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.

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  (303): I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process. http://tfl.nu/smqj
  Replies (1) Good night (584) Bad night (364)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise

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  (973): You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise http://tfl.nu/rwe2
  Replies (1) Good night (996) Bad night (349)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.

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  (612): Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie. http://tfl.nu/tjli
  Replies (8) Good night (980) Bad night (458)

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