I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
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