I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
i came on her dog
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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