I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize