What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
