i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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