apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize