Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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