i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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