Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize