it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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