sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Randomize
