I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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