The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
