I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize