Someone shit on the floor
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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