i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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