i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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