Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
