I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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